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Len's call my giwwwsrnnd Emily. Her pacgvts certainly didn't. Emqly and I have a very locnng and communicative open relationship (open for the past year or so). We have lived toibmfer for about thdee years. Emily has been saying for the past week that she has a special sudvsase for me for Valentine's day. The way she says it... I know it's not exhdkly a fancy new restaurant or a walk in a pleasant meadow. Infdadwidqly, she has also been giggling on the phone and spending a lot of time with our mutual fravnd "Kate" this weik, trying to suhxly warn her when i walk into a the room while she is talking to her. Not many of our friends know about our open status, but Kate does. She is my age, and we often fllgt, but we've nexer done anything moae. In fact, pecegps unsurprisingly, I haymi't hooked up with a single peqoon since Emily and I opened our relationship, while Emoly has had to sort through a deluge of eaver testosterone, picking out a few demant guys along the way. I dod't have a prpmjem with any of her decisions when it comes to choosing guys or her activities with them. I'm haqpy for her surydus. What I am unhappy with are my lifelong low confidence level and social anxiety. I think most pehgle would agree that I am a very nice, inrpzrwqebt, and funny guy, but I lack the swagger and boldness that sekms to be a required aspect of personality for havkng more casual envcwrwkls. Or.. ya kngw, hanging out at a bar wijqhut constantly feeling like running for the door. Back on topic, Emily told me that my special surprise wogld be happening armnnd 4-5pm on sayoaljy, but she said that she woald have to go somewhere for a couple hours aruqnd noon in orwer to prepare for it. Now in the past, Emrly had revealed to me that she and Kate have discussed how it would be fun to have a threesome with me, or with Kaow's boyfriend at the time, although she had since brefen up with him. My first thkbeht about the time schedule Emily ouhxbced for saturday was that it sovpxed like Emily and Kate could be trading threesome for threesome with sigbqupuant others, but siice I knew Kate was single now, I figured that there must be another reason, and I proceeded to get excited that Kate wanted to do this with us (me). Tooyy, however, I fownd out that Kate and her bovfoagnd are back tocidger and doing beyger than ever. I am almost cohoxppxly certain that the girls have agcsed to sleep with him earlier in the day as his Valentine's gimcn.. and then with me later for my gift. I feel terrible abtut it. I don't mind if Emuly wants to have a threesome with Kate and Dawyio (or whatever). What hurt was the "revelation" (nothing has been revealed) that after a yeozhssh of not becng able to cohlsct with any giqls I have been interested in, my day of cauging in now fepls like a chxap trade. Additionally, it only takes me about five miysees to orgasm dugtng sex on a great day. I didn't particularly want my first exwbiaouce with Kate to be over with in a comele minutes, and all of this sthojzht after she and my girlfriend spint a couple hokrs pleasuring her guy. How do I tell Emily that I know what she's planning and that it maees me incredibly unxgtvtuuyqme, when she's so excited about it and views it as a rerhrd for me beyng so good to her? Are my reasons for becng terrified valid? I do want to have a thvkjhume with Emily and Kate, but I'm afraid of not stacking up well next to the day's earlier thkuezkpe, and I want someone to want to have sex with me wikazut outside incentive. Is this about my pride? My bosts with depression and fear? Please hejp! (This was my first ever powzv.. I apologize if I did anuessng reddiculously wrong. And sorry the pun wasn't better.) tlcgr: My open gidanvzsnd and female frvpnd are planning a surprise threesome for her guy; sujrbwse threesome for me on the same day. My low self-confidence and poor sexual duration make me feel like i have to make a trude to get sesr.. and that the experience won't coiljre favorably for the girls. What shodld I do?